I’m actually at a loss for words. There’s nothing funny I can come up with that’s funnier than this photo.
That smile on my face – do you know what it’s saying? ‘Just pretend this is normal because otherwise you are going to SCREAM WITH LAUGHTER UNTIL YOU DIE!’
Say hello to Johnnie. Or as I like to call him, King Kong. I was in Kings Cross, checking out black cab drivers after Susan had set me the challenge of being photographed with one. Hmmm, tricky. Black cab drivers at main London stations are busy dropping off or picking up and harassed queues of Michael Douglas ‘Breakfast is for wimps’ types are waiting impatiently to be whisked to high stakes meetings. I didn’t fancy getting in anyone’s way.
I walked along, my hands deep in my pockets, head down. Then I turned a corner. There stood Johnnie, my knight in shining armour. When I say ‘shining armour’ I mean ‘fake fur costume with startlingly shiny plastic nipples’. Within moments we were shoulder to shoulder and I tried not to worry about fleas jumping onto my Kamikaze Butterfly dress, otherwise known as the Simplicity 2591 made in stretch cotton sateen.
This encounter took less than two minutes. It will stay with me for a lifetime.