Too Dumb To Have A Blog

This was my brain tonight:

I should go to Spin class – But I want to go home and sew – You brought your gym kit in for Spin class – But the house will be empty tonight – You ate too much at the weekend – I haven’t sewn in over a week – Lard arse! – Sod it, I’ll cycle home and sew.

So I start cycling home and road works have closed the street I normally go down. That’s fine, I’ll try a diversion. I get lost. I pass a pub called The Jolly Sisters and that makes me think of the pub in Hackney called The Three Sisters and I’m one of three sisters – hey, how cool is that, they named a pub after me and my sisters! Oh. I’ve missed my turning. Never mind, I’ll just go down here, except now I’m really lost and, oh look, there’s a child’s football team, I hope I don’t make a tit of myself in front of them. Woah! I’m doing an emergency stop in the middle of the road and nearly fall off my bike, but it’s okay there aren’t any cars because – what type of a loser would come down this dead end, anyway! – so at least I’m not dead now.

I cycle up to a main road and there’s a sign that says ‘Kings Cross 1 mile’ and I’m like, What? I left Kings Cross 15 minutes ago! Then eventually I get back on my usual route and negotiate my way past the lorries and the buses and my bum’s a bit sore now but, never mind, I’ll be sewing soon. Then I take another diversion to look at the house my ex-boyfriend used to live in – No, that doesn’t make me a stalker! He doesn’t live there any more, so how can I be stalking him?! – but now I’m going the wrong way up a one way street and there’s a van coming the other way and…

I should have gone to Spin class.

I’m going to go and sew now.

In other news, the Lego Christmas tree now has Lego baubles.*

* The man who built the Lego Christmas tree left a comment on my blog! How cool is that?

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26 Responses to Too Dumb To Have A Blog

  1. leahfranqui says:

    It’s probably named after Chekhov’s Three Sisters. I hate spin class. They yell at you.

  2. Kirsty says:

    Your brain works remarkably like mine! Except I would NEVER entertain the idea of going to spinning, you’d have to insert some lighter form of torture in the sentences to get my brain.

  3. CGCouture says:

    Lol! I’ve had many days where I’ve had similar conversations with myself. 😉

  4. Montana says:

    Ah-ha-ha! I have definitely had conversations with myself just like this… ~grins~ Good for you, for cycling to work and back. It is wonderful exercise!

  5. Kat says:

    Oh spin class! The bain of my existence. I haven’t been in a few weeks now i am too scared to go back. I always feel like I am dying in that class. That lego tree is so awesome!!!

  6. Leah Sparks says:

    The distracting side of my brain has been trying to persuade me to sew all day, alas the sensible side keeps reminding me I’m meant to be writing my dissertation. The result…? I did neither!


  7. Yeah, I do that too. I actually ended up driving around a circle today taking a “short cut”. Sigh.

    Love the leggo tree. It seems so perfect for Christmas and yet I’ve never seen something like it.

  8. MrsC says:

    The hive mind, or the monkey brain, as the Buddhists call it. Never stops, doesn’t always talk sense. I like being asleep, it mostly shuts up then…except for the scary dreams about bridesmaids’ dresses!

  9. Karen says:

    Did you know that he is a Certified Lego Engineer?

  10. Jasmine says:

    When one of my nephews was 5 he said to his Mum “When I grow up I want to be an Exerditionist”, and my sis said “That’s lovely. Err what will you do when you are an Exerditionist” and he said “I will go to the Lego Exerdition,, and pack it up every night, and then make everything again the next morning ready for the people to see the Exerdition”!!!!
    I am surprised that Lego Engineer bloke has time to write on your blog when he has to pack that tree away every night, etc etc…
    I don’t now what spin class is (tho sounds like something pollies do), but riding your bike is better. Tho why should going wrong way down a one way street mean anything? Here cyclists don’t even worry about red lights… (to some detriment).
    Ooroo, Jas xxxx

  11. Erika says:

    Hilarious! Thank you for the morning smile and laugh =) I’m a certified expert in getting lost, place me anywhere without a map in my hand and I’ll go in opposite direction of where I should =)

    Most times when I bring my gym clothes to work I manage to silence the voice telling me it would be so much better to go home. I need to cook, sew, clean, do laundry, call various familymembers etc etc… However, the last few times I’ve done the “right” thing and gone the gym even though I REALLY felt like skipping it, I’ve ended up getting sick afterwards. So you might have saved yourself from the flu with that detour ; )

  12. ooobop! says:

    Oh Karen… that’s so funny. Did you even manage to sew after that little adventure? I am exhausted just reading it! Still more interesting than a spin class and probably more effective too! 🙂

  13. Siga says:

    Funny. You did get to sew in the end, didn’t you?

  14. Roobeedoo says:

    If that had been me it would have been raining and I would have fallen in a puddle and cried.
    You have so much energy! 😀

  15. Jenny says:

    Well I see that as a win win. You got loads of extra biking exercise ( which made up for missing the spin class) and you got to sew!
    I’m babysitting this weekend and I am looking forward to raiding the kids lego boxes to see if we can make our own Christmas tree – I reckon it will be more of a frankentree!

  16. ooo what did he say? wonder if he did the R2-D2 in John Lewis
    ps. noticing your banner pics have changed,- like it!
    pps. had my first crafting/work anxiety dream last night. For project close I had to crochet blanket squares, turned out I had not done enough and the wrong size – team furious with me, woke up in abject panic

  17. Suzanne says:

    It’s nice to know someone else has a brain that functions the same as mine! Enjoy the sewing!

  18. Amy says:

    I was chuffed to see the Lego tree on my way up to Loughborough last week, but it didn’t have baubles then… the baubles are awesome!

  19. Felicity from Down Under says:

    I agree that you managed to get extra exercise by doing all that extra cycling. AND you got to sew. Excellent!

  20. Yep that’s cool. I think my Lego fan son wants to meet you – I mean you’re almost famous in Lego circles…

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