Hello, readers. Consider yourselves honoured. After months of persuasion and the multiple signing of Non Disclosure Agreements, a very special presence in the blogosphere has agreed to write a guest post.
She’s infamous for her love of velvety coats (that only need grooming every six weeks), her fondness for fake fur (especially when it comes in the shape of a duck and makes a honking noise) and her ability to strike just the right pose for a blog post.
Quadrille Crafts offered their latest book, Woolly Woofers, for Ella to review. The author, knitting legend Debbie Bliss, lives in our locale, Walthamstow. So needless to say, Ella took her new blogging responsibilities very seriously…
Ella: The first thing you need to know about this book is that there are a lot of dogs. There’s Brian and Ernie the pugs, Carmel Corn the Teacup Yorkie, Dexter the French Bulldog, Millie the English Springer Spaniel…
Ed: Um, the knitting. We want to know about the knitting.
Ella: Knitting?
Ed: The outfits all those dogs are wearing.
Ella: You mean the outfits those dogs are enduring. Yeah, 22 whole outfits that a human can inflict on an innocent dog. Feel proud of yourselves, guys! Are these the faces of happy woofers?
Ed: Oh, come on! You’re just bitter you weren’t in the photo shoot.
Ella: I don’t want to talk about that.
Ed: I’m sorry, readers. We should explain. Ella was invited to be in the photo shoot for this book but because her owner had prior commitments (a day job) Ella had to regretfully decline. There’s still a certain amount of sulking at Didyoumakethat Towers.
Ella: Er, did you read the NDA? Keep that to yourself! Let’s talk about the stuff that humans can make with wooden sticks and wool. Like, they’re so clever. Mod Dog looks quite cool…
And I’ll admit there’s a certain je ne sais quoi here…
Maybe this cowboy would let me borrow his neckerchief?
Ed: In short, would you recommend this book?
Ella: To dogs? No. You’re totally being exploited. To humans? Absolutely. You need something to keep your tiny brains occupied, and another activity that persuades you to put us top of the pack can only be a good thing. Next time? Just don’t force a dog to dress like a bee. Know what I’m saying?
Woolly Woofers by Debbie Bliss (published 11 September) is one of the best knitting books to ever come into my possession. It’s fun, it’s joyous and it’s inimitably innovative. Debbie Bliss and Quadrille should be extremely proud of themselves. I sooooo wish I’d been at the photo shoot!
Disclaimer: Ella would like to point out that she received no compensation for writing this blog post (not even dog treats) and all scathing opinions are her own.
The bee got me! One for Ella perhaps? One of the best book reviews I’ve read, thanks Ella.
Good review Ella thanks. But tell me, is there a Sherlock Holmes style cape and deer stalker in the book? If there isn’t, there should be. X
There is, Jane! You can see Ella scrutinising it in the second photo.
Brilliant Karen. You’re so dog.
(Note intentional comma omission!)
That was one of the best posts that I read in a long time! Thanks for the laugh! And even though I’m neither a big dog fan nor a knitter, I’m really tempted to buy this book. The layout with the dogs and the drawings is fantastic!
I’d buy this just for the illustrations – it’s wicked!
Ella – hilarious – great photos and I love the background illustrations. My cousin and I were chatting the other day about how (many years ago) we used to dress up her neighbour’s dog in outgrown kids clothes. What an obliging dog she was.
Makes me yearn even more for a Fox Terrier, and although I’ve never wanted a pug, but maybe, if I could dress it as a bee….
Anyway, sorry you didn’t make the photo shoot, you would have made a beautiful princess or ballerina – maybe Debbie’s next book? Gill x
Ella says: Pet hell freezes over before I wear a ballerina outfit.
hysterical! fab review and great to have it done from a different perspective.
What a great review! Loved it.
That bee outfit photo is priceless – the poor dog looks so resigned! (And I love seeing photos of Ella in your posts!)
Hilarious! Splattered coffee everywhere. Now to hone done a doggy knitty person to order this book for!
AHAHAHAHAHAHA! I have to have this! Doug isn’t going to be happy with this purchase, but he and Peggy look so cute in clothing that it’s hard to resist!
Dear Ella,
It has been a singular pleasure reading your review!
I hope we will hear more from you, and wish your agent much success with contractual arrangements vis a vis your current management.
Best wishes in your career,
del
Ha, I laughed so much at this, brilliant post. It doesn’t help my need for a dog though, after just seeing the cutest puppy ever on my walk home from work and reading this soon as I got in, my doggy need urge is huge right now lol!
As one who is owned by cats, your post reminded me of this bit of dialogue from “Big Bang Theory”:
Leonard: What’s wrong with a football jersey?
Sheldon: Nothing. That, however, appears to be a football cocktail dress.
Leonard: I’s the smallest size they had, except the one for dogs. I can’t believe they had one for dogs.
Sheldon: Oh, yes. Canine football fans are a common sight in Texas. Cats, however, refuse to wear sporting apparel. My sister found that out the hard way.
Very Smart looking fellows these pooches are…
Hahahaha! You nailed it, Ella! Best book review EVER! LOL
Brilliant book review!! I love the French outfit!! (Persephone says: thank you for the heads up Ella, I will be avoiding that like the plague!)
Still laughing over here. Jo x
That bee pug just made my day!
This was hilarious. So fun to read! And the bee is the best 🙂
Ella, thank you for such an insightful review of the book. As a small brained human I want get the book, pick up my needles and start making items for any unlucky pooch that I encounter.
Oh Ella. I’d be complaining to the management that you didn’t get to go to the photoshoot. You’d have been the star, Dahling! You should at the very least demand that darling Parisian outfit as compensation.
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Fantastic , funny review😃 Love the bee!